In the car with Nana and Papa.
Eitan: “I’m going to see A Camel on Monday.”
Nana: “A camel?”
Eitan: “A Deer. I mean Adir.”
Names can be confusing.
“The greatest part of my life is my mama and my dada.”
We feel the same way about you!
In the car, on the way to school Monday morning.
Eitan: “I’m worried.” (pronounced woowwied)
Mama: “Usually I’m not worried. You’re great at school and you always have a good day, but today I’m a little worried.”
Eitan: “why?”
Mama: “I’m worried about the lice in your school.”
…
Eitan: “Do Dada’s have babies too?”
Pause while I collect myself and try to come up with an answer per the books: answer the question, don’t provide extra information
Mama: “Only mamas can have babies in their bellies”
…
*MENTAL ALERT! WHAT IF HE THINKS THEY ARE IN OUR STOMACHS???*
Mama: “When I say belly, they are in a different spot than where the food goes. Mamas can still eat. The baby is in a place called the uterus or womb.”
…
Eitan: “How does the baby poop?”
*of course….*
Mama: “it doesn’t use its tush. The baby is connected to the mama through something called the umbilical cord. It connects to the baby’s belly button. The food goes in that way and the waste comes out.”
…
Mama: “The cord gets cut when the baby comes out. It doesn’t hurt the mama or the baby.”
Eitan: “Did I have that?”
Mama: “yes”
*still worried about the lice*
Categories
Mama, the bitch
Eitan has a lovely bed. However, he prefers to sleep on his travel mattress on the floor. I always put sheets on both just in case. Yesterday I was trying to decide if I needed to wash the sheets on the bed because he never sleeps up there. I asked Eitan, “do you ever sleep on your bed?”
He replied in the saddest voice, “why? Are you going to send it away?”
Do I have a reputation for being a bitch?
During chol chamoed Pesach, Eitan is home a lot, and we have to work. Nana and Papa always help out a lot, which we really appreciate. However, having him in the house isn’t very conducive to a calm work environment. I suggested – since Eitan is a great shopper – that Nana and Papa take him to Staples. They came home with some gems.
At one point, Eitan had to pee. Papa took him to the bathroom. They peed together (make an X!). However, Eitan’s pee was much shorter than Papa’s. Eitan was impatient and ended up yelling at Papa, “You’re done, Papa!” and trying to close the lid. Suffice it to say, Papa was not pleased.
When Eitan finally decided to let Papa finish peeing, he went to wash his hands. Suddenly Papa started to hear an electronic sound vroop vroop vroop. He looked around and Eitan was getting paper towels out of the automatic dispenser. Lots of paper towels. Papa called, “Eitan that’s enough!” and Eitan replied, “I’m getting for you!” vroop vroop vroop
Finally, they continued their shopping journey. At one point Eitan was behind Nana. Nana started yelling “where is he?! where is he?!” Eitan popped out, “Don’t freak out Nana”.
They came home with sticky notes, note pads, a new box of colored pencils, a ‘time we’ll return’ sign, and lots of great memories.
We “check” Eitan five times at night before he goes to sleep. There’s always too much conversation during these checks, but this was one of my favorites.
Eitan: “Mama can I ask you something?”
Me: “Anything”
Eitan: “I love you more than anyone in my class”
Me: “I love you more than anyone in the universe”
Eitan: “I love you that too”
Categories
Pooping Expectations
Eitan: “I have to poop. I can go meself [pronounciation].”
…
Eitan: “There’s pee in here!”
Dada: “That’s okay, you can poop in someone else’s pee.”
Eitan: “No I can’t”
Dada: “Yes you can”
…
Dada: “Come to think of it, that’s probably your pee.”
…
Eitan: “There’s pee in here!”
Are we really doing this again?
Eitan recently (and briefly) stopped eating MadeGood bars. We asked why and his response was, “they’re too chocolate chippity.”
Seriously???
Eitan’s ability to pick up idioms is impressive – at least to us old people. The other day, Rich pointed out to me that some mold appeared to be growing on some dried flowers. Eitan came over to take a look but after about one second declared, “I don’t want to be involved in this.”
Me neither, kid.
Eitan was playing a game where he leaned a couch cushion against the edge of the couch and walked up it. We warned him, “be careful!” Of course, the cushion slipped and he whacked himself on the edge of couch. His repsonse?
“That was unexpected!”